Lisker: Welcome, fellow gamers, to the first official NES Heroes Death Match. With me tonight is a man of such greatness, that I am HONORED to be with him today. A truly great star of the gaming world, he has been gracious enough to help me start the first fight. I am humbled to bring you the great-
KEFKA!!!
Kefka: VWEE HEE HEEE!!! I have come here as I know this stupid collection of mindless brawls will cause chaos in the streets, leading to world destruction, and ultimately, NOTHINGNESS!
VWEE HEE HEEE!!!
Now, you no doubt ask, why would he DO such a thing? Why has he allowed himself to help start this horrible event? Because...
Lisker: Heh. Yeah...That's what I'm talking about. Great to have you here Kefka!
Kefka: Great? What is GREAT? What qualifies as GREAT? What in the entire world is GREAT?
Lisker: *Smiles toward camera* Well, this fight, of course!
Kefka: NOTHING is great! Only that which IS nothing is great! I curse all of existence!
Lisker: .....Even ME?
Kefka: ESPECIALLY you! I HATE you!! I hate ALL of you!!! For I am...
Lisker: ..........................well........................let's.............start the fight.....
Lisker: So, Kefka, who are you betting on?
Kefka: Do I have to?
Lisker: Isn't there any advantage that you see the other possesses?
Kefka: I just came here to use my fame to begin this slaughterhouse, so don't push your luck...
Lisker: It's a beautiful day here in the graveya-
Kefka: It's NIGHT! It's ALWAYS night!! I just blew up the sun a couple of hours ago to needlessly display my power, remember?
Lisker: Oh, right.................that was COOL...
Lisker: HEY!!! We didn't start the fight yet!
Kefka: Then maybe NEXT TIME you should SHUT UP!
Lisker: ...................shut..................up?
Kefka: I CURSE your existence...
Lisker: This could be it! A one-hit K.O.....
Lisker: WAIT!! It's not over yet! Firebrand has somehow reflected Arthur's own lance by concentrating his power!
Kefka: REALLY? Well, thanks for pointing that out, I thought the whole time they were frolicking in the garden haviing tea! You IDIOT.......
Kefka: What th- His CLOTHES came off!
Lisker: I know he always loses his armor whenever he gets hit, but I don't think I'll ever find that anything short of odd...
Lisker: Poor Arthur, how embarrassing.......You can't help but feel sorry for the guy...
Kefka: But the humor's still there!
Lisker: Looks like Arthur's stolen someone else's wardrobe...but who?
Kefka: Stop playing a bigger moron then you already are. It's that fat plumber and you know it.
Lisker: Arthur currently possesses Mario's abilities, so Firebrand has brought up a good point. Arthur will be given back his armor, and the fight will continue.
Lisker: IT'S A....................cross...
Lisker:................
Kefka: HA!!! TOTALLY ineffective! Religion! What good is-
Lisker: -Kefka's views on religion do not necessarily reflect the opinions of this site!
Lisker: HOLY %#$!!!
Kefka: That's one helluva lance!
Lisker: I just wonder how Arthur's able to hold that thing up...
Lisker:.....................................................................................AH. He COULDN'T. Question answered...
Lisker: And thus the victor is decided! Firebrand has WON!
Kefka: Well, I'm gone, and I can honestly say, I had quite a bad time! Well, if worse turns to worst, I'll be seeing you later, Lisker!
Lisker: Well, there goes a great man, but you can expect another great fight. From.... *smiles at camera again* -The Sub-Con Lair! Well......................I.............REALLY need a sign-off phrase...........Maybe I'll have come up with something by the next match...
